Lent: Second Time’s a Charm

Insanity can be described any number of ways. Some might say it’s training for a half marathon in this cruel polar vortex. Some might say it’s trying to convince your feminist girlfriends to see the Fifty Shades film with you. Some might say it’s lining up in sub freezing weather for a chain grocery store to open on the Upper East Side.

No, I didn’t do that last one. But I did stop and take a photo of them, which required I take off my gloves, and that was a pretty insane decision, too. So yeah, we’re even, crazy neighbors.



Define it how you will, I think Einstein’s depiction of insanity is still the most accurate: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Which is why my 2015 Lenten Resolution is downright lunatic: I’m going to plank a minute every day from now til Easter in a solemn observance of the liturgical calendar and/or an unparalleled desire for abs.

Why is that crazy, you ask? Because that was my same exact plan for Lent last year, and if you recall, it didn’t go well. Some of that falling off the commitment bandwagon could be attributed to an overnight flight to Hong Kong that would have seen me planking in the aisles, but some of it was just downright indolence — something Jesus and his 12 workout buddies probably wouldn’t have stood for. Of course, they did their cardio in sandals, so who’s asking them?

I’m already two days in, having planked last night at my first Body Pump class ever and this morning (begrudgingly) as I prepared to write this post. I can do 38 more days of this, right? Considering I may have found a date to the Fifty Shades movie in my most feminist of feminist friends this morning, I now believe anything is possible.

Who’s with me? (In the planking, not the movie, unless you wan’t to come to the movie, in which case, the more the merrier! Unless you’re my dad, in which case, I’m totally not inviting you to see that movie with me, no offense. It would be more uncomfortable than that time I watched Clerks with you as an 11 year old. Ah, the memories.)


2 thoughts on “Lent: Second Time’s a Charm

  1. Although, being of a slightly nautical background, I tend to associate “planking” with piratical punishment, my dismal showing at last Sunday’s Austin Marathon suggests I can use all the core-related help I can get (also quad-related, hamstring-related, calf-related, and avoiding-fried-foods-the-night-before-the-race-related), so I’m willing to give it a try. I’m with you, Speedsprite! (As for “Fifty Shades of Grey”, I’ll confess I don’t know much about it, but I have little interest in seeing a movie that appears to be based on what’s been happening to my hair over course of the past 30 years — that story’s sad enough already…) — Vaughan

    1. Vaughan, congratulations on finishing 10th in your division in Austin! That’s an impressive feat, especially when on the mend from a hamstring tear. You’ve mastered the masters thing. Rest up, and see you at another race soon. New York City 2015, perhaps?

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